The media had one of their semi-regular terrorism panics Wednesday, this time over the warning that jihadists are thinking about sewing bombs into wannabe martyrs. Relax, an explosives specialist at the Department of Homeland Security writes in an e-mail to Danger Room. If Al-Qaida and company are turning to cockamamie ideas like surgically-implanted explosives, it???s a sign that the terrorists are in very, very bad straits.

One guy tried to blow us up with his shoe, so we outlawed footwear.
One guy tried to blow us up with his underpants, so we outlawed clothes.
One guy may soon try to blow us up with his body. We are considering outlawing guys.

It's the Illuminati. It's the government. It's the media. It's the paedophiles.
It's us.