I don’t need to cut myself some slack, I need to recognize what I’ve achieved so far. It’s essential that Istep back, see my context and recognize that I’ve achieved a lot already.

  • I’ve dropped 15 kg.
  • I regularly go to the gym (3x a week).
  • I study and practice my instrument 10x more than I ever have.
  • My bass playing has improved immensely in the last year.
  • While I’m not regularly cycling this winter, between April and October I did regularly and over long distances (30-70 miles). This was curtailed only by injury.

Sure, I’m still expecting immediate results, I’ve still not sussed out my sleep balanced, I’m still tired and still feel undermotivated, and yes it still feels like my momentum is driven by anxiety rather than by a positive energy: but I am doing what I said I would do. And that is a real thing.

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I play bass, I cook, I look out the window. Sometimes I prefer wondering what's out there to going out and looking. But not all the time. I only recently learned that leaving two spaces after a full stop is obsolete.

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